“One day I found out that personal history was no longer necessary for me and, like drinking, I dropped it… Little by little you must create a fog around yourself; you must erase everything around you until nothing can be taken for granted, until nothing is any longer for sure, or real. Your problem now is that you’re too real. Your endeavors are too real, your moods are too real. Don’t take things so for granted. You must begin to erase yourself.”
Carlos Castaneda

Journey to Ixtlan

Dance

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We had just finished final preparations of this space in Barcelona for Shahar’s Tune project during March 2008.  Sonia, the owner of the studio who was also a key collaborator in this project, had just brought in for Shahar the CD (the soundtrack of a wonderful movie The Life of Others) and it was playing in the background. We didn’t have a video camera so I used my cellular to capture this movie.

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After this I sat down with tears in my eyes. It was a divine experience not many people will get to witness in person. I was also in pain – I remember thinking to myself  “I love photography, where my heart expands and I experience joy & fulfillment when I do it”. Even though I was in Barcelona, completely immersed in creation, I was experiencing friction and difficulty – my freedom to pursue this work felt (and still feels) threatened. Over the past year I have done very little creative work. When this video was taken I wished I had a decent video camera to work with, now I am simply hoping to find a way, a space and a capacity to get back to the studio.

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