“I too did not want to take the path of a warrior. I believed that all that work was for nothing, and since we are all going to die what difference would it make to be a warrior? I was wrong. But I had to find that out for myself. Whenever you do realize that you are wrong, and that it certainly makes a world of difference, you can say that you are convinced. And then you can proceed by yourself. Any by yourself you may even become a man of knowledge.”
Carlos Castaneda

Journey to Ixtlan

Shifting Weight

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Some mornings, like today, I start the day by sitting in the garden with a drink and a book. when I do this I feel I set a healthy rhythm for my day, that it down-plays any unnecessary ambitions. This morning as I leaned forward to get up from the chair I noticed a shift.

My mind was already moving towards the next activities – which be called ‘work’. What caught my attention was a tension – a kind of anxiety that was not there while I was reading. I seemed to be making a move from a concept of ‘leisure’ to a concept of ‘work’. I felt I was taking on a burden. I also realized that this was an unnecessary effort – that I could bring qualities of ‘liesure’ into ‘work’. I would then enjoy the work, I would take my time doing it and would be probably do a better job.

The burden is an expression of incorrect effort – there is no need for it. It reflects habits that have formed over a long time. It reflects fears and expectations. It is hidden and subtly affecting my mind. I was able to catch in in a subtle shift in the weight of my body. It happened so fast that the mind could not get in the way – and I learned something new about myself.

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  • By How FEM Happened - Faith & Fear | iamronen on June 2, 2009 at 6:35 am

    […] A new learning began with SweetClarity but really escalated during the development of FEM. When I was working on SweetClarity everything was open ended. FEM is more specific and condensed and also taking place under even more financial pressures – with a more impressionable limit. […]

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