Category: inside

  • 1000 Petals

    1000 Petals

    In March 2024 I arrived in Israel for what I intended to be a longer visit. The visit demanded commitment and became a return. I came with a carry-on and one large checked in piece of luggage. The two most valuable objects in the checked luggage were a Shakuhachi flute and painting accessories (gouache paints…

  • How to draw the Sri Yantra

    How to draw the Sri Yantra

    Introduction I’ve played with the Sti Yantra over the years numerous times. In the beginning there were few and hard to find instructions. Today there are many more, especially video tutorials. I’ve been through quite a few and it is very difficult to find a clear and good one: Please note that the instructions focus…

  • Mushrooms, second encounter

    Though I am gradually moving towards a better energy equation with work (it could be that I am simply “getting back in shape”) it still consumes most of focus. This means that I tend to end days and weeks tired. This last week I also allowed, for the first time, urgency within the organization infiltrate…

  • Humility

    Following yesterdays larger bit of translation, here is another, smaller bit from “Nisayon” by Yair Caspi this time about humility: A study of humility requires overcoming a popular objection to it: at the beginning of the 20th century the socialists claimed that humility is a conspiracy through which the rich wish to train their workers…

  • A Modern & Critical View of Judaism

    The following is a rough and unedited (my) translation of a chapter from a book called “Nisayon” by Yair Caspi. I hope to provide more context about Yair Caspi in future writing. As I read it and recognized my place in an inherited identity I have actively rejected most of my life, it I felt…

  • Ancient Greek Metaphysical Damage

    Introduction I recently completed yet another reading of Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance by Robert Pirsig. There is a section near the end of the book where Pirsig, in his attempt to point the root of our current metaphysical crises, reaches the philosopher of ancient Greece. I’ve always experienced both a draw to…

  • The Art Of Life

    Because sometimes you have to make a film about the man you just met on the beach a gift from Anna-Maija

  • Celebration and … the Sacred?

    Maija asked me recently about my relationship with celebrating … and I am generally uncomfortable around celebration. Today I encountered these two stories from Rick Rubin, a master of delicacy. The first story sets the context for the second story and the second story (wait for it after the song and forgive the clumsy but…

  • Who By Fire – Leonard Cohen, Israel … and I

    I’ve been distantly aware that Leonard Cohen visited Israel during the 1973 Yom Kippur war and sang for soldiers in the desert. So I went into this podcast episode about this event with a sense of curiosity. The story is told with care and subtlety and I look forward to reading the book. My curiosity…

  • בדל של אור

    אני מופתע כיצד האלבום הזה נגע ונוגע ביהוא מעורר בי תחושה של תרבות עתיקה שאולי עוד תקוםהוא מעורר בי תחושה של שייכות עתיקה ושל שייכות עתידית שכבר עבורי כנראה לא תוגשםהוא מעורר בי מחשבות אודות קהילה רחבה, עמוקה ומהותית

  • The Erotic as Power

    This poignant essay contains a beautiful answer to a critical question: how do you know what Good feels like? a gift from Jennifer

  • A gift from the mushrooms?

    I came out of practice and went to the kitchen to take the next step in bread preparation. I was mixing the dough when Iulia stepped out of her room. This was our first encounter of the day. I stepped back from tending to the bowl on the counter and turn to face Iulia. I…

  • 5.5 grams

    On June 22nd I finally experienced psychedelic mushrooms. I’d been thinking about it for a couple of years. The previous day I was having yet another “dead-end” day with Iulia and I wanted to look into that. But I awoke to the potential late in the day. My stomach was full with dinner. I was…

  • Choking on my past?

    Choking on my past?

    I wrote this partial post back in mid-January 2021. When I started it I had a feeling I may never finish it, and indeed I haven’t. Shortly after aborting it I did write a letter to my family on the same subject. But this post stayed with me. I have no desire to resume writing…

  • Farewell Milford Graves

  • ההיסטוריה המלאה שלנו

    שלום משפחה, כנראה שכבר שיתפתי את חלקכם ב- “המלצה” הזו. אך אני מרגיש צורך לחזור עליה ואולי לנסות להדגיש את ערכה. הקישור יוביל אתכם לסדרה של 6 פרקים (שביחד מכסים כמעט 24 שעות!) של podcast המספר את סיפורה של ארץ ישראל: http://www.martyrmade.com/fear-loathing-in-the-new-jerusalem/ הסיפור דומה מאוד לסיפור שקיבלתי כשהייתי תלמיד בתיכון. אך הסיפור גם שונה. קודם…

  • Mixing Paint

    Mixing Paint

    Over the last couple of months, I’ve settled back into painting with gouache paints. It took me time to warm up to brushes, to the different viscosities of paint, and to mixing colors … and to find something to paint (more on that soon I hope). As anyone who mixes colors can attest, it is…

  • My 1st Shakuhachi Decade

    My 1st Shakuhachi Decade

    It’s been over a decade since I first held the Shakuhachi I currently play. I am making a note of it because I am looking forward to a new chapter in my relationship with it. I’ve had an on-and-off relationship with the Shakuhachi. When I am with it, as I have been for the past…

  • Shodo – Getting Started

    Shodo – Getting Started

    A couple(?) of years ago Iulia went to a calligraphy workshop in Cluj and the papers she came back with shimmered for me. It stayed with me for a while. Eventually, I did some research into it and that led me to Shodo: THIS spoke to me. I seem to be drawn to Japanese culture.…

  • The Edge of Something

    This comes to me to compliment an impoverished philosophy. “I feel I am on the edge of something …” David Bohm