“The nagual is the part of us which we do not deal with at all ... At the time of birth, and for a while after, we are all nagual. We sense, then that in order to function we need a counterpart to what we have. The tonal is missing and that gives us, from the very beginning, a feeling of incompleteness. Then the tonal starts to develop and it becomes utterly important to our functioning, so important that it opaques the shine of the nagual, it overwhelms it. From the moment we become all tonal we do nothing else but to increment that old feeling of incompleteness which accompanies us from the moment of our birth and whichs tells us constantly that there is another part to give us completeness”
Carlos Castaneda

Tales of Power

Just Ujjayi

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We’ve been on the move for a few weeks now- first taking apart our home, then moving to my parents – and next week off to Romania  (this time next week I’ll be waking up for the first time in Romania). I haven’t been able to practice for at least two weeks (except for a little Shakuhachi playing) – I wasn’t able to create practice conditions in the midst of the chaos. The past few days, now that we have settled a little bit (no longer live in a mess – though we did bring some of it with us to my parents place) – my thoughts have been slowly gravitating towards practice.

This morning I sat down for a short breathing practice. I was thankful to my body for remembering how to sit properly. All I did was a little Ujjayi breathing (I did not have access to the quality of breath I am used to in my Pranayama practices). I remembered how magical  a simple breathing practice can be. Ujjayi and Pranayama breathing practices are second nature to me – and it takes just a few Ujjayi breaths for me to feel my body remembering and connecting with the experience I have assimilated around them – a kind of quantum leap of the body.

My presence in the practice was steady but definitely pre-occupied. I didn’t make any attempt to still my mind – I simply sat and watched as an endless stream of thought passed through me – going through everything from important to petty issues. It would have been foolish of me to seek quiet and settling when my life is in the eye of a storm. Watching the storm pass through me and carry me was a restorative experience – it created a sense of presence. I was happy to find that there was no pretense or denial – that there was peaceful containment. There was no sense of struggle – as if all that I am has come together to weather this storm and there wasn’t a single voice (mind, body, spirit) of malcontent – I am really leaning into it 🙂

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